What Can You Do If You Are Feeling Overwhelmed While Caring For Your Baby – Preventing Shaken Baby Syndrome

 

As a Childcare worker in Illinois, I am required to take a training on preventing Shaken Baby Syndrome every 3 years. I’ve taken this training many times in my career.

Caring for an infant or toddler can be a stressful and frustrating undertaking for anyone. Crying can overstimulate even the most patient person. Excessive crying is extremely frustrating. Every baby is different, and all are within varying levels of maintenance from low to high. A high-maintenance baby will naturally cry more than a lower-maintenance one. As well, adults are all different, and we vary in our ability to handle the crying of a baby.

According to the INNCRA training, crying is the number 1 trigger of the physical abuse of shaking a baby, and babies can cry for 4 or more hours a day. Shaken Baby Syndrome can also happen with older children, and anyone who has cared for a toddler knows how absolutely insane they can behave. Frustrating is an understatement.

I’ve known very few people who do not eventually become frustrated or even angry at consistent crying or crazy toddler behavior. Being aware of the stages of anger can help you recognize when you may be approaching losing control. This training lists three stages.

1.      Pre-anger – before the trigger(s) set you off.

2.      Heating up - during this stage, our ability to think clearly is lessened  

3.      Before boiling over – the few seconds before boiling over

At any of these stages, you can take steps to keep yourself from reaching your boiling point and possibly harming your child or a child you are caring for.

·         Take a break – walk away, take some deep breaths, put the baby in a safe place, and let them cry until you can calm yourself down

·         Contact your support system – sometimes just talking to someone can help, ask them to come help if you really need it

·         Utilize the help that is offered at:

o   Call the 24-hour Crying Baby Helpline - 866-243-2229

o   National Center on Shaken Baby Syndrome -  (801) 447-9360

o   Erikson Institutes’ Fussy Baby Network – 888-431-2229

Before you reach this point, you may want to make yourself a “Crying Plan.” In your plan, you will want to include:

·         Three things you can do to help calm your baby

You can include reasons why they may be crying, how to meet those needs, and what things usually soothe your baby.

·         Three things you can do to calm yourself when your baby’s crying is becoming overwhelming.               

You can include calming techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, and using a support system.

·         Who can you call when you need help

Who’s in your support system?

 

Remember, anger and frustration are normal; shaking a baby and hurting a child are not.